Today and tomorrow

October 18, 2011 § Leave a comment

Today has been a perfect fall day. The kind where you put on and take off layers depending on how much wind there is, and whether you happen to be in the sun or the shade. T and I lingered outside this long morning, while I browsed jobs online and entertained dreams and occasionally tossed her orange tennis ball. The light was just like fall light ought to be.

The farm is winding down, and quickly. Several frosts have come, and plants are beginning to die. I might have flowers to take to the market this week, and I might not. But there are shelves full of all kinds of varieties of pumpkins and squash, and bunches of cornstalks for sale at the farm stand. Afternoons we will cut down finished plants and shell dried beans. I have small plates and container lids spread out on the counter, drying seed. In the evenings I soak in the bathtub and circle vegetable and fruit and flower varieties from the Seed Savers Exchange catalogue with a Sharpie marker, already excited for next year.

But today, this perfect day, I need to remember what comes before the next farm season. I’m filling out application forms for temporary Christmas jobs (admittedly I actually kind of enjoy retail – it’s fun helping people find just the right thing, especially during this cheery holiday time, and the fast pace makes the days go quickly). I’m looking for full-time jobs that might start after that, ideally ones that I can do during the day while putting together plans for my own farm. I’m sometimes anxious. I’m mostly calm. Even struggle and change and waiting can produce a fine harvest. I wonder what winter will bring? And next year? Oh, today. One of those days where you juggle loving the present with hopes for the future.

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